"Better be careful Max, I might shove you in there, and then this gingerbread palace would be all mine!" he said with a chuckle.

I closed the oven and then turned to look at him. He had just showered and dressed. His damp, dark hair was curling slightly at the ends and I could smell the faint aroma of aftershave on him. He was knotting his silver tie as he stood there grinning at me. He looked so incredibly sexy just standing there like that.

"I take it by your pathetic attempt at a joke, that you're nervous," I said as I helped him straighten his tie and then patted his shoulder, trying to reassure him.

His dark brows knotted. "Max," he said in an ultra-serious tone, "I really wish you hadn't invited my family over today. I've told you how they are. You know how I feel about my dad, and my brothers..." he broke off and his cheeks started to glow red.

"Your brother's what?" I prodded gently.

"They don't see me as a man, Max. They still treat me like I'm a kid or something. They never take me seriously." His mocha-brown eyes clouded over with anger as he told me this.

I gave him a big smile. "That's just the way it is with big brothers. Mine are the same way. You just have to ignore it and get on with your life." I jabbbed my index finger softly into his ribcage, and smiled. "Besides, I was under the impression that you kind of enjoyed acting like a kid, sometimes."

He sighed deeply and shook his head like he'd given up trying to explain. "That's not the same and you know it," he huffed.

"OK, tell me," I said as I walked to the cabinet and got out a few cans of pumpkin.

"I was never really got to be a kid, Max," He said in the saddest tone I've ever heard from him.

I turned and gave him my full attention. He'd told me some about his childhood when we'd first met, but I knew there were parts of his life that he didn't like to talk about, so I'd given him his privacy. "I'd like to hear about it." I said quietly.

He started pacing, tugging at his tie. "By the time I was born my brothers were practically grown, Max."

I nodded. That was something I already knew.

"They had all moved out when my mom got sick, and I ended up looking after her. I never got to play or have fun at all. I was always worried about her..." his voice broke off with a small choking sound, and I saw a glimmer of tears in his eyes."

"Yes," I crooned huskily. He wasn't telling me anything I didn't already know, but the pain it was still causing him, affected me deeply. "You and your dad must've been very worried about her."

Dane laughed scornfully, and the bitterness in his voice, when he spoke, startled me. "The thing is that my dad was weak. He couldn't stand that my mom was sick and he wouldn't help take care of her. He started drinking, and..." I heard the catch in his throat and I went to him and held him close.

"You never told me that, monkey," I whispered as I rubbed his back.

"Well, I was ashamed of him. I still am. He didn't take care of my mother, and he didn't take care of me. He left it all to me, and it was really hard. Someday mabe I'll tell you just how hard...."

He trailed off, and I was left with an uneasy feeling, but I didn't say anything. I simply held onto him and gave him some space to continue.

"I hate him, Max!" he barked out suddenly. "After all she'd done for him--for all of us--and he was too fucking weak to be there for her when she needed him most."

I bit my lip to keep myself from saying anything negative about his father. It wouldn't help to do that, and I knew it. I loosened my strong hold on him a little so I could look into his face. "You were brave, Dane. You did a good job," I told him while I looked deeply into his eyes.

He nodded solemnly. "Yeah, but my brothers don't care about that. They still treat me like I'm just a kid. And you know what pisses me off most?"

"What?"

"That they didn't help out at all."

I shook my head, and reached a hand up and rubbed his jaw softly, feeling the sandpapery scratching beneath my fingers. "You're more of a man that they'll ever be, Dane. Don't you ever forget that."

I watched as a lone tear trickled down his classically handsome face, and then he smiled softly. I could see he was trying to lighten up and that was my cue to play along.

"What if I forget that Max?" he asked teasingly.

I slapped his backside gently. "I guess I'll have to warm your butt to help you remember, young man," I mimicked my sternest tone.

He gave me an impulsive kiss then. A warm, almost frantic smooch that took my breath away, and then stepped back with an almost a shy look on has face. "Max?"

I raised my brows questioningly.

"I don't want you to spank me when my family is over here, OK?" he looked down at his shiny black dress-shoes as if he were embarrassed by the request.

I smiled at the sight. "What are you planning, mister?" I finally asked as I folded my arms across my chest, and narrowed my eyes at him.

He looked up. "I'm not planning anything Max!" he protested loudly. "I just..."

"Have I ever spanked you in front of company?" I interrupted quickly. "Why would you think I'd start now?"

He grinned and shrugged. "I just wanted to be sure, that's all."

I pointed to the cans of pumpkin on the cabinet. "OK, now that you have my assurance, you want to help out here a little? Or maybe I should get my magic wand, and wave it over everything.

He rolled his eyes and walked over to the cabinet. "I guess I'll have to help, because you're cooking sucks!" he practically crowed at me.

I swatted him and laughed. "Watch it!"

He yelped and then laughed. "I'll be good!" he said as he rubbed over dramatically at his bottom.

The rest of the morning and early afternoon passed quickly. The kitchen was cozy, and warm from the heat of the oven, and the turkey smelled wonderful as it cooked. At one point, I brought our small portable TV into the kitchen, so we could watch the Macy's parade while we prepared the meal.

As I stood at the counter and chopped nuts, I looked over at him, sitting at the kitchen table with his feet up on another chair. He appeared totally entranced as he watched the parade, and he had a bag of miniature marshmallows on his lap, and was popping them into his mouth between comments. "Look Max, the Pink Panther!" he said with his mouth full. "That's my absolute favorite float!" "It is pretty cool," I said as I watched him enjoying himself. I turned back to what I was doing. I couldn't stop thinking about what Dane had told me about his father, however, and I kind of regretted inviting the people who had caused so much pain to Dane. I resolved to make the best of it though, for Dane's sake, if nothing else.

My folks arrived around two o' clock, and my mother sat with Dane in the kitchen, talking about their favorite Thanksgiving foods, while my father and I turned on the football game in the living room. My father asked how business was going, and I talked a little about my job. Computer programming was something he knew absolutely nothing about, and if I talked about the details, he just got a lost and distant look on his face. So we pretty much talked about the financial aspect of it. He knew it payed well, and that was enough for him.

We were still watching the game, and discussing how the Dallas Cowboys were doing this year, when I heard a gigantic crash coming from the kitchen.

I jumped up, and rushed in there, and what I saw nearly made my heart stop! The TV set lay broken on the floor --shards of glass, scattered about-- and Dane was reaching down, his hands only inches from the set, which was still plugged in.

"Don't touch it!" I barked out at him. He stopped, and still bent over, looked up at me in alarm. "It was an accident, Max!" he said, his voice trembling.

"Get away from the TV, Dane!" I ordered harshly. I waited until he was clear of it, and then went to our bedroom and flipped the switch on the circuit breaker which supplied power to the kitchen.

After I unplugged the set, I flipped the switch back on and with my heart still in my throat went to confront Dane.

I grasped his upper arm. "Don't you ever touch a malfunctioning electrical appliance while It's still plugged in!" I rasped out at him, as I gave his arm a savage shake. "You know better than that, Dane!"

My mother came into the kitchen at that moment, looking concerned. and Dane gave me a pleading look. I released his arm, and took a deep, calming breath.

"What happened? I heard a loud noise while I was in the bathroom," Mom asked me as I got the broom and dustpan from the corner.

"The TV fell off the counter. I knew I should've set it further back," I answered as I started to sweep up the broken glass. "Dane, could you put the set out in the storage room for me?" I asked politely, forcing a calm I didn't feel.

He looked questioningly at me for a minute, and then bent over to pick up the TV, giving me a perfect view of his compact, muscular butt in the process. I frowned grimly as I thought about how I was going to have to tear that little butt up later. He could have been electrocuted touching that TV, and I knew that if I hadn't gotten into the kitchen as quickly as I had, he would've touched it. The thought of something happening to Dane, nearly paralyzed me for a moment, and I felt an inkling of the devastating emptiness of my life, if he were gone.

I don't know if he sensed where my thoughts were going or what, but when he stood up, he turned and faced me, tv in his arms, and mouthed "I'm sorry."

I nodded stiffly.

He looked at me for a minute, sighed, and then carried the television outside to the storage room.

The house was alive with chattering voices and laughter, as I set the golden-brown turkey on it's platter and carried it carefully to the larger of the two tables in the dining room. I surveyed the table to make sure everything was ready. My brothers and sisters had insisted on bringing some of the food, to help out, and it had been a relief not to have to handle everything. This was the first Thanksgiving where Dane and I had hosted the meal, and I was exhausted from all of the work. I looked over at Dane who was sitting on the sofa talking to my mom, and I smiled. My mother was so crazy about Dane, and she was just about the only other person that he was truly himself around. The fact that he hated being around groups of people, but didn't complain today at all about it, did not escape me either.

"Dinner is ready," I said loudly, to be heard over all the noise in the living room, and when Dane looked over, I gave him a big, warm smile and crooked my finger and beckoned him over. I watched as he went automatically over to the smaller table, the "kids table", and pulled a chair out.

"Dane, your place is over here, beside me," I told him.

He looked pleased and mildly surprised. At twenty-two, he'd never been asked to sit at the main table. He'd told me that just recently, when I had questioned him about the fact that we never sat together at family gatherings. He said it never crossed his mind to sit at the main table. Well, those days were over, Especially after what he'd confided to me this morning.

I squeezed his hand as we sat beside each other.

There were only a few of us sitting at the table now, drinking coffee and chatting. Everyone else had gone outside to play football or take a walk in the crisp fall weather. I was full and sleepy and wasn't really joining in the conversation.

Dane's whine startled me. "Maaax! I'm bored!" he declared loudly.

My mother stopped talking to my aunt and looked over at Dane with a smile. I could tell she thought he was just the cutest thing in the world.

I turned to him. "Stop whining, and go outside and play football." I said automatically, as I put some sugar in my coffee

I watched as his bottom lip slipped out slowly, petulantly, as he drummed his fingers on the table. "I want to doooo something," he said in the same whiny tone.

I noticed my aunt was looking strangely at Dane, as if she couldn't quite grasp what was going on. My mom looked like she was going to start laughing.

I leaned over and hissed in his ear. "Don't start that now, mister,"

"But Max! I'm bored!" His voice was loud now. Too loud.

I stood up from the table and picked up my empty coffee cup. "Dane, would you help me with something in the kitchen, please?" I requested, trying to stay cool, as I walked away from the table.

He huffed and got up, dragging his feet like a five year old, all the way to the kitchen.

Once we were alone, I whirled on him. "What are you doing?" I demanded, trying to keep my voice level.

The pout was still in place. "I'm tired Max, and bored. Tell them to go home!"

"No, Dane, I'm not going to do that. If you're tired, you can go lie down, but I don't want any more of this behavior," I told him impatiently, putting my hands on my hips.

His eyes blazed, as his pout fell away. "Why? Am I embarrassing you? Maybe I should just leave if you don't think I'm acceptable," he retorted, his face set in angry, unyielding lines.

I put my hand steadily on his shoulder, hoping to placate him a little. "Look, monkey, you're right. You just caught me a little off guard in there. After what you told me this morning about your family, and wanting your brothers to see you as an adult, I guess I just wasn't expecting it. Does that make sense?"

He nodded. "I guess. But my family was outside. Only people in your family were in the house." He said this as if he were accusing me of something.

I smiled at him and shook my head. "It sounds like you're accusing me of being embarrassed of you, Dane," I said quietly as I stared into his eyes.

He looked away from my steady gaze. "Max, that's not-"

"Because if that's what you're saying," I interrupted him in mid-sentence, "then what you're really telling me is that you acted like a bad boy in there to deliberately embarrass me. Is that it?"

He scowled at the suggestion. "No, that's not what I was doing!" The way his eyes shifted belied his words, though.

"Aw, c'mon brat, 'fess up, your bottom's already toast anyway."

He flushed cutely. "Max, you're confusing issues. Doesn't matter what I was doing, you're supposed to understand me, and what I need."

"Well, I love you, if that counts for anything."

His eyes softened at my words and then he shifted from foot to foot. "What if everyone was in the living room, and I was bad in front of everyone? What would you do Max?" There was note of uncertainty and a little wistfulness in his voice, that touched me.

"A trick question, just what I need when I'm exhausted like this," I answered with a laugh. "I did promise not to spank you when your folks were over, but you didn't make a return promise not to give me a reason to spank...so, hmmm, that's a toughie, Dane. Why don't you go on in there and do that. I mean in front of your brothers and everything, and I'll just wing it. How's that sound?"

I took a step toward him, reached out, and pulled him close to me and as he opened his mouth to say something further, I caught the faint aroma of cloves mixed with cinnamon on his breath. I put my mouth over his, and gave him a warm kiss. He started relaxing in my arms and deepened the kiss.

After a few minutes I pulled my mouth from his. "Now you quit being such a brat, you hear? Or you're going to really get it!" I warned as I pressed my lips together to feel the warmth that Dane's mouth had left there.

He smiled and nodded, then started to turn away. After a second he turned back around with a question in his eyes. "Max, I didn't mean to break the TV, I'm really sorry."

I grasped his arm and forced him to face me, then I looked into those velvety eyes of his. "The TV doesn't matter to me. You know that. What matters is you. I'm going to try to impress on you how dangerous it is to act without thinking, Dane. I can't take the chance that it will happen again."

"Not while they're here though, Max," he said imploring me with his eyes.

I gently swatted his bottom. "I already told you I wouldn't spank you when company was here didn't I?" I asked with a grin. "You callin' me a liar, you little monkey?"

He relaxed visibly and then chuckled. "What would happen if I did call you that Max?" he asked, his voice full of glee.

I looked to make sure both kitchen doors were closed, then slapped his bottom quickly and lightly three or four times. "A lot worse than that!" I said and then laughed as he dance around a bit, covering his backside.

"OK," I told him, forcing myself to sound stern. "Go and find something to do, since you're so bored. And stay out of trouble!"

He pouted obligingly. "I need to change clothes. I'm not comfortable in these," he informed me as he pulled on his tie.

I shrugged. "OK change, and then be a good boy and try to socialize a little. You think you can do that?"

I saw the worried look in his soft brown-eyes, and I knew how difficult my request must seem to him. But I also thought it might be good for him. He'd be in the security of his own house--I'd be close by--and maybe it would help with his self-confidence a little.

"Max-"

"For me? Will you do it for me?" I asked gently.

He sighed. "I'll try," he answered sullenly.

"That's all I can ask of you, baby, is that you try." I reached out and squeezed his shoulder for encouragement.

He seemed unhappy and nervous as we exited the kitchen together.

Later, as I was sitting in the living room, and one of my nieces was playing the guitar for entertainment, I realized I hadn't seen Dane for quite some time. I put my concern about it on the back burner. After all, people were all over the house, and some were still outdoors. He was probably trying to talk to people, like I'd asked him. I relaxed, and leaned back on the sofa as I listened to Amanda playing 'Blackbird'. She was really very good, and I concentrated intently on the music.

Raucous laughter interrupted my enjoyment of the song, however, and then I heard voices coming from the front porch.

"Oh shit, he's really doing it! Dane you're so crazy!"

More laughter, and then another voice: "Hope nobody sees him!"

I jumped up from the couch, interrupting Amanda's playing, and then quickly walked to the front door and flung it open. I peered through the screen, but all I could see was my nephews and cousins in a row on the porch laughing and shoving at each other.

"What's going on?" I asked as I walked out to where they were standing.

My seventeen-year-old cousin, with tears of laughter streaming down his face, could do no more than point to the sidewalk.

I looked through the merry crowd and saw Dane dashing down the sidewalk, his pants pulled down in the back, hands clasping the sides of his jeans, as the light of the gas-lamp in the yard illuminated his bare bottom.

"OK, guys, go back inside," I said crisply to the laughing onlookers as I kept my eyes focused on Dane in absolute astonishment.

I heard a few grumbles but they went inside, still laughing.

I knew that in a few minutes, everyone in the house would be informed of what was going on. I shook my head, not believing what I was seeing.

I sat on the front steps and waited for Dane to run back in the direction of the house, amusement and anger warring within me. He saw me before I had a chance to call out to him, and quickly pulled his jeans up and fastened them. I watched as he trudged through the grass, his hiking-boots crunching the leaves. He hung his head as he made his way to the porch.

His face in the glow of the lamp, was flushed and sweaty, as he stood before me, and I imagined the grin that had probably been there, minutes before, as he had done his bratty mooning act for the delight of his audience.

"Sit down," I demanded gruffly

He sat beside me, still out of breath, and put his arm around my shoulder.

I had to force my voice to sound stony when I spoke. I didn't want him to think that I thought this was funny, but I could definitely see the humor in the situation. "So tell me what that was all about," I demanded.

"We were just playing Truth or Dare," he answered, sounding embarrassed.

I stifled a smile. "And that was your dare? To run around with your pants down? Dane, what if a neighbor had been watching, and called the police? You could've been arrested for indecent exposure."

"But Max, I just pulled them down in the back. I wasn't really exposing anything!"

My lips quirked upward at the corners despite my best intentions for them not to. "I thought I asked you to socialize and to stay out of trouble," I reminded him. "Is this your idea of how to go about that?"

"Yes," he answered as he turned somber eyes to me. "I thought maybe they'd think I was cool or something, if I did it, and I didn't think it was huge deal."

"But monkey, doing outrageous things is not the way to make people like you," I said very gently, feeling sad for him. "You don't need to go to extremes like that, because you're a likable guy. Why don't you realize that?"

He didn't say anything.

"Well, you told me this morning that you wanted your brothers to see you as a man. Do you think this stunt was the best way to accomplish that? It kind of looks like you deliberately sabotaged all your earlier efforts in that regard. I just wonder why you did that."

He turned those eyes on me again and I could see the shine of tears in them. "I didn't think of it like that. maybe cuz I never got to play much when I was a kid..." He stared into space then, not finishing his thoughts. I ruffled his hair. "OK, it's not the end of the world if they know about this. I do want you to try to stop being so impulsive all the time though, and to think about what it's worth to you to have other people see you as a mature adult, if indeed you do." I looked ruefully at him and shook my head. "You're going to get a little reminder later for this silliness, that's for sure." I promised.

I stood up suddenly. "Come on, let's go in. Why don't you tell everyone good-night and leave the explaining to me?"

He stood up and nodded, subdued. "OK, and I'm sorry Max, I guess I shouldn't have done it."

I smiled at him as I opened the front door. "You little brat," I said fondly.

His face brightened a little at my words.

It was late when the last of the guests left. I put the leftovers in the fridge and unloosened my tie as I wearily made my way to our bedroom. Dane was sitting on the bed cross-legged, playing solitaire. He looked questioningly at me when I walked in.

I gave him a smile and then sat down on the bed with him. "Put the cards away," I told him as I removed my tie. For a minute I considered handling this in the morning when I was refreshed and more clear-headed, but I was afraid Dane wouldn't be able to sleep until we'd taken care of things.

Very slowly, he put the cards back in the pack and then looked at me. He looked as exhausted as I felt.

"Did you have to explain anything to anybody?" His words were full of apprehension.

"Yeah, but I think most of our guests thought it was fairly amusing, and no your brothers didn't ask about it, so I don't know what they thought. Who cares what they thought, anyway, Right?" I asked with a sudden grin.

I saw the corners of his mouth tilt upward then, and I looked severely at him. "But Dane, it still wasn't a smart thing to do. My main concern is the reason that you did it."

"You're the one that wanted me to socialize!" he reminded me loudly.

I couldn't argue with that. Obviously he didn't understand that playing a clown wasn't the way to make friends. I realized long ago a certain naivete in Dane, and it was something that brought out my protectiveness of him, like nothing else. "I think we need to work on some kind of plan for when you socialize," I said quietly. "I do appreciate your attempts to try though."

Dane smiled at the compliment. "I said I would try, and I did," he murmered.

I chewed on my lip for a minute, thinking. "OK, here's the deal. Three swats for showing your hiney to everyone on the block."

"But no one was looking!" He protested.

"You don't know that. What If poor old Mrs. Granger had been out watering her Maple tree, and had a heart attack after seeing your butt?" I asked with a grin.

Dane started to chuckle. "I guess three swats is fair, but not too hard, OK Max?"

I reached out and tickled his side lightly, and he screamed with laughter.

I stopped tickling, and steeled myself for the other thing we needed to discuss. "OK, the TV issue is more serious," I said giving him his cue that he needed to settle down. It took him a minute to do so, and I waited until I was sure that he was aware of the change in my attitude, before I began. "You could've been killed if you had touched that broken TV, and I'm going to spank you so that when an impulse like that comes into your mind, you'll think about how sore your bottom was the last time you did something dangerous, and you might stop before you get hurt."

"But I just reached down to see, I didn't think-"

"Dane," I interrupted firmly, "did you hear what I just said? If I can keep you from getting killed from doing something without thinking, then I will do whatever it takes to prevent it. I couldn't bear to be without you monkey, and even though you might think it's unfair, I'm going to spank you."

He looked sullen, and very weary as he looked at me. "I don't want you to spank me for something I didn't mean to do."

"I know you don't, but this time I'm going to anyway," I told him as I rubbed a hand across his dark hair, and looked into his face, waiting for a sign that he would accept a spanking that he thought he didn't deserve. It was extremely important to me that he never put himself in danger again, but just as important was our bond of solid trust. So I watched and waited."

He sighed heavily and then gave me a spectacularly childish pout. It was my cue to carry on.

I drew my hand back and patted my knees. "C'mon now, let's get your spankings over with. Undo your pants."

He unsnapped his jeans and then pulled the zipper down, protesting the whole time. When he finally realized that I wasn't discussing it with him anymore, he sighed deeply and crawled over my lap. I tugged his jeans and boxers down and wrapped an arm securely around his waist. "I will do anything to try to keep you safe," I said as I brought my palm down squarely across his olive-skinned bottom, making it bounce gently. As I raised my hand again I noticed the clear markings of my hand print on the otherwise flawless skin. Dane groaned as I continued to pepper his small muscular butt with my palm, and I felt his body twisting beneath my strong grip around his waist.

"You're hurting me Max!" he wailed as I continued raining quick, steady swats onto his upturned behind. I didn't say anything. I knew it hurt, because I was spanking him vigorously, but I continued on anyway.

After a few minutes I stopped and heard him exhale loudly. I waited until he had gotten his breath back and then I helped him to his feet. He looked at me as I pulled his pants up, and the look cut right through me. It was a look of angry confusion. As his eyes bored into me, I could see there were no tears in them.

"Dane, I'm sorry if you thought that was unfair, but-" I began.

"Yes, I do," he interrupted coldly. "I think it was totally unfair."

"I did it out of love though," I stated quietly.

He continued to stare at me, and then his eyes softened a little. "It wasn't fair Max, but most of the time you are fair..."

I smiled at him and took his hand in mine.

"So, if you say it was out of love, then that's how I'll accept it, because I trust you." he told me as he squeezed my hand.

I nodded, "We really make a good team, don't you think?" I asked him with a smile.

He grinned and turned so that his backside was toward me. "Go ahead, just three," he said as he glanced over his shoulder at me.

I brought my hand back and gave him three very light swats on his jeans. "Oooch that hurt!" He said with a laugh as he turned back toward me. Then he closed his eyes and puckered his lips.

I stood up and put a hand on the back of his neck and then gave him a kiss. "I guess you have me pretty well trained, monkey," I said affectionately. You just have to pucker your lips and I obey.

He opened his velvety eyes, and then winked at me. "Will you play Yahtzee with me for a while?"

I rolled my eyes skyward in mock irritation. "if you insist," I replied, trying my best to sound put-upon.

He smiled, his eyes twinkling happily, and then trotted off to get the game. I watched him go, and for the first time on that long Thanksgiving day, I gave thanks. Then I wondered how I could ever not be thankful. After all, I had the honor of knowing, and loving Dane.

Copyright © 2004 Tris